A polar bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'll have a rum 'n' ........................................................................................................................Coke, please."
“Why the big pause?” asks the bartender.
“I dunno, I was born with 'em,” says the bear.
“Why the big pause?” asks the bartender.
“I dunno, I was born with 'em,” says the bear.
I've been experimenting with breeding racing deer.
People accuse me of just trying to make a fast buck.
When I was a kid, we played spin the bottle with the girls.
If they didn’t want to kiss you; they would have to give you a dollar.
If they didn’t want to kiss you; they would have to give you a dollar.
By the time I was 12, I owned my own home.
Here's a groaner, not even craptacular: 
I bought the world's worst thesaurus today. Not only was it terrible, but it was also terrible.
I bought the world's worst thesaurus today. Not only was it terrible, but it was also terrible.
