How To Approach A Smoker: The Proper Way

[CMD-Ky]

I went to the University of Kentucky in '67, my hair was regulation. Later, they burnt the armory, I wanted an education. I understand. I have tired of good intent, I am more interested in the results.
Leave me alone, read my signature.

The road to hell is paved with "good intentions" (Control). The problem with people that want to "help" me is that they set themselves up to be the arbiter of what is good for me. I was in the Navy at the height of the Viet Nam war and my regulation hair cut was an immediate indicator of that fact. You are likely not old enough to remember the "Moonies" that infested airports in the 70's. I was assaulted every time I went through an airport because they thought I needed saving. I listened the first time, but quickly got around to telling them to F*** off without slowing my pace. One of them decided to step in front of me and found himself staring up at me as I walked over him.
The point is that I (and probably a lot of people on this board) have had a lifetime of people telling me that I should do what they decide (in their infinite wisdom) for my own good. And the anti smoking folks are at the top of this list. In my mind this is about one group of people trying to control another group of people and I get touchy about that.
I understand that your intention was benign. But someone like you started the war on smoking some 30 years ago with the very same intentions.
Sorry for the rant, but I thought that some context would be helpful.

 

[EIHYPI]

How to approach a smoker: the proper way...

Now I feel it should read : "The Proper Way Is To Not Approach A Smoker"... took some learning but finally got it right.

 

[EIHYPI]

Of course it's an issue with vapers approaching smokers. But I realized that vapers getting nagged is an issue too. I actually got nagged by a co-worker who quit smoking without vaping rather cold turkey. So many of them are so closed minded and think that cold turkey is the "only" way to go. I'd get remarks from her like how are your smoke filled lungs, or how was your cigarette if I just vaped etc. Today she said something and I said sternly to her, "Look, if I didn't use this electonic cigarette I would still be smoking today". She finally said a nice remark to me something like it's good we are all healthy. It then settled in that this is the harsh reality with vaping. If not for it so many of us who still be smoking today. I'm grateful.

 

[stols001]

There is No Talking to the cold turkey crowd. I kind of admire them, but they seem to be an unhappy, argumentative lot, when it comes to different approaches. Not to stereotype them completely, but I was a Most Reluctant Cold Turkey victim during my accidental pregnancy and during nursing, and I was not the most fun and vibrant person to talk to about anything smoking related (I mighta punched a vaper, honestly, LOL) fortunately vaping wasn't *around* then, LOL.

I was particularly annoyed with my ex when during labor, he kept leaving to smoke , to be fair I do think that's kinda unacceptable, really, he could have purchased some nicotine gum for the occasion or something, but he did not. Fortunately, I was starting to get a feel for the dude, so I invited my mom and sis to come with me for some actual moral support.

Cold turkey sucks!!!!! Oh, I mean I admire it and all, but unless my IUD fails before I hit menopause and I have to do it all over again, well.... (Oh dear Lord I hope not).... That method is *so* not for me.

I'm glad you got your Cold Turkey coworker off your back, man, it's annoying. I mean, do you go up to her and tell her that gaining a lot of weight is unhealthy, for example? Tell her that she shouldn't eat all the breakroom donuts, diabetes is dangerous? I'm betting you don't..... Could you though? Because that might be my next sally, but I can get cranky if given enough provocation.

Anna