Sorry about all the topic posts but I like choices! I also love jokes and stories. This one has been on the net forever but it's good. maybe one or two of you missed it. Post some funnies for me too!
Curtain Rods
She spent the first day packing her personal belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.
On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music and feasted on a pound of shrimp,
a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Chardonnay.
When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited
a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain rods
She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.
Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning and mopping
and airing the place out.
Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned
Air fresheners were hung everywhere.
Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during
which they had to move out for a few days.
In the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.
Nothing worked,
People stopped coming over to visit,
Repairmen refused to work in the house. .. The maid quit
Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.
A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they
could not find a buyer for their stinky house.
Word got out, and eventually, even the local Realtors refused to return their calls.
Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank
to purchase a new place.
The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going
She told him she missed her old home terribly, and would be
willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.
Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed
on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth...
but only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed, and
within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork.
A week later, the man and his new girlfriend stood smirking as
they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new
home... including the curtain rods.
Curtain Rods
She spent the first day packing her personal belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.
On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music and feasted on a pound of shrimp,
a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Chardonnay.
When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited
a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain rods
She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.
Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning and mopping
and airing the place out.
Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned
Air fresheners were hung everywhere.
Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during
which they had to move out for a few days.
In the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.
Nothing worked,
People stopped coming over to visit,
Repairmen refused to work in the house. .. The maid quit
Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.
A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they
could not find a buyer for their stinky house.
Word got out, and eventually, even the local Realtors refused to return their calls.
Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank
to purchase a new place.
The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going
She told him she missed her old home terribly, and would be
willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.
Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed
on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth...
but only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed, and
within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork.
A week later, the man and his new girlfriend stood smirking as
they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new
home... including the curtain rods.
It really was a sad story from her point of view, I just wonder how her new boyfriend sleeps at night 
